Thirteen Thursday
1. Because of a comment I left on a blogger site while playing Michele Agnew’s Weekend Meet & Greet, a graduate student taking a class on blogging at Trinity College in Hartford, Connecticut, found Loose Leaf. He brought it to the attention of his classmates and teacher, and my blog ended being part of their classroom discussion.
2. Apparently, having a blog was one of the class requirements. The student who found my site left me a comment, and an email conversation ensued. He recently sent me his final paper for the class, "The Effect on the Blogger by His Readership," in which he critiqued several blogs, including mine. I regularly visit his blog now, and I’m hoping he’ll lift the non-blogger.com comment ban soon.
3. While driving home with my husband for my father’s recent funeral, we went through Hartford and passed the Trinity College exit on the same night the class was taking place.
4. The subject of my friend Fred’s recent Floyd Press newspaper column, “A Road Less Traveled,” was on blogging. In it, he pointed out that becoming a columnist was an opportunity that came about as a result of him being a blogger.
5. My Asheville Potter Son Who Loves the Red Sox is a mad artist. He also has a theatrical background, which is how wearing a gorilla costume to his alumni soccer game while home for Thanksgiving came about.
6. When I pulled up the gorilla picture for this post, it made me remember the dream I had last night. I dreamt a huge grizzly bear was coming after me. I locked myself in a my childhood cellar and prepared to break out a window to escape, if it got in, which it did. I woke up with an adrenaline rush just as I was wondering if I could fit through the window and the bear was about to get me. I understand the dream to be about the full degree of grief that I am not wanting to feel about my father being gone.
7. I got my computer back from the shop. Now the dial-up sounds like The Mexican Hat Dance. Unfortunately, it isn’t completely fixed, and at one point, I was using both it and my laptop at the same time. Two keyboards, two mouses (or is it mice) was pure chaos for someone like me with dycalculia and no tech-no-logic sense.
8. My father, who recently passed away, was the youngest of 11. I keep thinking of the movie “The Five Sullivans,” which was about 5 brothers who fought and died in WWII. In the last scene of the movie, the youngest brother, the last to die, took his place and joined arms with his 4 brothers in heaven. When I think of the movie, it makes me feel that my dad has re-joined with his own brothers and sisters. As kids, we watched this movie with my dad, and everyone was bawling, especially him.
9. When I was home for the funeral, I slept in his bed. I thought it would be hard, but it wasn’t. Sleeping in his bed was like being up in his lap, and I felt like I was getting a part of my dad that he couldn’t even give me in life.
10. Just a week before my father’s car accident that led to his death 6 weeks later, he was dancing the jitterbug with my mother at a family wedding.
11. A couple of days before my father died, I attended a Dance Free in Floyd. I love to dance, and as someone who has struggled with Chronic Fatigue for many years, I’m always amazed at how it can energize me. I can dance for nearly 2 hours without stopping.
12. This is the time of year when I like to listen to John Lennon’s Christmas song…And so this is Christmas and what have you done...Another year over…A new one just begun.
13. War is over, if you want it. War is over now.
Post Note: Now go on over and visit Leanne, the host of Thirteen Thursday. She keeps a list of all bloggers who participate and explains what it's all about.
Comments
Is his paper, "The effects of the blogger" available online? I pray all is well with you and your family as you've had many burdens recently.
Posted by: sage | December 8, 2005 11:33 AM
Hi Miz Colleen. I've been thinking a lot about you the last few days. I will continue to pray for strength and peace for you.
I'll bet it was comforting sleeping in your dad's bed. What a wonderful way to be close to him.
Have a good day.
Posted by: Chickadee | December 8, 2005 11:35 AM
#1 is really interesting! I am going to check that out.
I love the gorilla pic. Glad to see you today:) xo
Posted by: MommaK | December 8, 2005 12:31 PM
Chickadee, Thanks so much for thinking of me.
Sage, I don't believe the paper would be available online, (and I likely would not have gotten a copy if I didn't get a favorable review). It was a well done article and something all us bloggers would be interested in...what classes across the country are saying about us. I love the fact that universities are delving into the subject.
Bob and Rose, I love you too. I'm wearing the toasty smart wool socks you gave me right now!
MommaK, xo
Posted by: colleen | December 8, 2005 12:42 PM
I miss John Lennon...I always am selfishly sad for the music we missed with his death. Here’s my Thursday 13.
Posted by: Janet | December 8, 2005 12:54 PM
My Thursday Thirteen:
http://lilybleu.net/blog/?p=206
Posted by: Lily Bleu | December 8, 2005 1:03 PM
Hugs to you and your family during this season.
Happy to see you back. :) My 13 is up for week!
Posted by: SquashedToad | December 8, 2005 1:36 PM
Hi Colleen,
Great list, as always. Your dream sounds loaded with anxiety. If I woke up after dreaming something like that I don't think I'd get back to sleep. I wish for you a nice cup of tea and game of scrabble, to bring you peace, challenge your mind, and ease the pain in your heart.
xoxoxo
Posted by: Leanne | December 8, 2005 2:11 PM
That is so beautiful about your dad. And hey, I LOVE that gorilla!
http://running2ks.blogsome.com/2005/12/08/13-more-memories-about-the-holiday-season/
Posted by: running2ks | December 8, 2005 2:40 PM
Leanne, I'm playing Scrabble right now! Checking in on the wireless computer. It's my first day out and about. Playing is theraputic for both of us (Mara is still grieving Elliot). Plus, I am drinking tea! (and winning at this point).
Mara just wrote the word QUIT and she shouted "I quit!" and I said "What!! You can't quit!"
Posted by: colleen | December 8, 2005 2:43 PM
Colleen...
I will quit on you and give you zero anytime!
Thanks for the first game we never finished...
*Love*
~Mara
Posted by: mara | December 8, 2005 3:42 PM
Such a powerful 13. Thanks for sharing. So many emotions flooded over me as I read them. My list of 13 found at http://www.20six.co.uk/Enigma seems trite now in comparison.
Thanks.
Posted by: Enigma | December 8, 2005 4:26 PM
You have been on my mind lately. My thoughts and prayers go out to you on this holiday season. What sweet imagery sleeping in his bed being like climbing into his lap. I remember doing that and the wonderful sense of security that provided me as a child.
I did my 13 today too, drop by and say hi!
Posted by: TC | December 8, 2005 5:46 PM
Loved your Thirteen Thursday post. Just today I heard John Lennon's Christmas song.. it has always been one of my favourites.
Posted by: Simply Coll | December 8, 2005 7:30 PM
It's neither mouses or mice. It's 'mouse devices.' I can even furnish proof. I'm a little smarty, huh?
Posted by: Paul N. | December 8, 2005 8:42 PM
Hi Colleen..I love your Thursday Thirteen...I just did my first one and haven't a clue if it's okay....I went to Leanne and was unable to leave a comment..this is the second time I've tried to do that and it said the comment thing was closed...Is there some secret word I need to know? (lol) You always write with so much feeling and honesty, I love coming here to read your posts.
I'm don't know if I'm supposed to leave my Thursday Thirteen link..(I don't know how to do that, I might add...!!!) But, if you get a chance stop be and see my maiden voyage into the Thursday Thirteen world...and many thanks for always insoiring me.
Posted by: OldOldLady Of The Hills | December 8, 2005 9:11 PM
I love what you said about being in your father's lap. My grandaddy is like that for me. I remember when I was a kid that my favorite place was in his lap. He has a big leather chair in his office where he reads. I would go climb in his lap and just sit while he read. The last time I saw him, my daughter did the same thing. She didn't want to leave. I understood why. Because his lap is the safest place in the whole world. Bless your father Colleen.
Posted by: InterstellarLass | December 8, 2005 10:59 PM
my prayers are with you. My mother passed away in January so this will be my first Christmas without her. My dad died 6 years ago so now even though I am a grandmother myself I feel like an abandoned child. I have always had a parent to be there for me. I have buried a husband, parents, stepdad, my inlaws, sister and grandchild in the past few years. The missing them doesn't go away but the memories of my time with each one keeps me going. Stay strong and keep those memories flowing.
Posted by: peggy | December 8, 2005 11:17 PM
Hi Colleen...Thanks for coming by...I DID FINALLY get on Leanne's comments..I have no idea what I did or didn't do before....but, Thanks and of course I'm not going to stop blogging; not yet, anyway! (lol) My humor is sometimes obscure...and like you, in this short time I've been doing this some very lovely things have happened through this process....I've met such wonderful people, such as yourself, my dear...A GREAT bonus!
Posted by: OldOldLady Of The Hills | December 8, 2005 11:28 PM
It isn't Thursday, but Friday.
You had snow? This morning at 7AM it was pitch black dark with all the dense cloud cover.
I missed this post yesterday. Love the way you saved the explanation of the gorilla until nearer the end. This kept me asking myself "Now, how did she get someone to put on this costume and hold up that sign?"
The process of grieving will happen in its own time. Each grief is different, each step taken in that grief may be short or long. Just know that there are many out here who will continue to remember you in our prayers.
Posted by: srp | December 9, 2005 11:11 AM
Nodding at srp's note. For me it was my father's music tapes that brought me closer to him, because music really had been our common language.
Posted by: Elissa Malcohn | December 9, 2005 3:27 PM